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Tuesday, September 27, 2005

Finding my voice in this sea of voices

I admit that I'm having a difficult time figuring out what to post about here. I look around and see posts on being invited here or on blogging, and I just can't make myself blog on either of those topics. Similarly, I don't know that my favorite blogging topics would fit in well here, where there really are no boundaries.

Then it occurs to me how odd a thought that is: looking to make my voice blend in with others'. I've spent most of my life working hard to make sure that my voice only blends with those around me when our goals are the same. I've never wanted to be a lemming. Lemmings don't do much, and I want to be free to do whatever I want.

Lemmings look at the past year of my life in wonderment. They look at me and ask, "But weren't you scared?" or "I could never do that. How did you do it?" The lemmings who are on the verge of breaking through and leaving the lemming lifestyle behind them tell me, "I wish I was as brave as you. Then maybe, I could run away from the things that need to be run away from, too."

It's that second group that I love to talk with. They're the ones trying to find their own voices in the sea, their courage to step up and stand out just a little bit. They're the ones who break up the monotony, and have a wide sea of potential opportunities laid out in front of them. They just haven't quite accepted that it's all right to reach out and take the chance.

So, maybe I can find my own voice among those around me after all.

Comments:
So what did you do this past year?
 
I packed everything that would fit in my car plus my cat, moved 2,400 miles away from home, and stumbled my way back into teaching. Then, for fun, I kicked my depression and started working on starting a business.
 
Very excellent post, Rebecca. That's the point. Exactly.
 
Thanks, Troy!
 
Rebecca, I've been struggling with the same thing about what to post here, so thanks for the perspective & permission!
 
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